Each Human's Purpose

I was listening to a message by Bishop T.D. Jakes the other day and he said something that really resonated with me. It also caused me to think back to a statement by my uncle Rev. Daley. Paraphrasing him, Bishop Jakes said that our purpose is not to become the person that our spouse wants us to be, but to become the person that God wants us to be. I took that a little further in my mind and I thought about the fact that who I am supposed to be in any relationship is initially between God and me. He created me for a purpose and He is the only one that can direct me as to what that purpose is. Sometimes in relationships, we have disagreements because a person is not living up to who we thought they should be. This doesn't only happen in romantic relationships. There are others out there trying to tell us what type of parent we should be, even what type of adult child we should be. You could have someone that has more instructions as to what your Christian walk should look like than the Bible. They have our actions and what it should look like all planned out for us. I'm not saying that we shouldn't listen to feedback from others but at the end of the day, it is initially between God and you. When others are trying to criticize you, the most human reaction is to mirror that energy. In a negative situation, the better reaction is to try to create a more positive energy. Constant correcting and making someone feel less than because we have a preconceived notion of how they should be acting or what they should be doing is not good. We were created to be in relationships with each other so that no one would be alone and so that we could work in community but sometimes we hurt those relationships with our actions. According to my uncle, make sure that what was created to serve a worthy purpose does not become unworthy. He was very clear, we are of unique value to God. Do not allow anyone to use you as a footstool. There are some that manipulate us by trying to bend our actions to their will. Harmony in relationships mean that neither party is on a self directed path. If I am trying my best every day to become the best version of myself, and you are trying every day to be the best version of yourself, we win together. Imperfect people come together to try to make it through an ever changing life together. Some days are going to be smooth and some days are going to be rough. Bask in the joy of the smooth days. Life happens. Challenges come. At those times, with God's purpose at the forefront of our mind we have to determine, is this where we lean in closer or do we part ways peacefully. I'll give my uncle the final words, "Tolerance is bringing your resentment under control".